Sailor: I got my flu shot today. My shoulder hurts and it’s hot **starts rubbing his shoulder**
Me: That’s a bummer.
Me: Oh stop.
Sailor: I might become an anti-vaxer, this sucks.
Me: Well, it’s been a good run. Guess we’ll have to get divorced now because I can’t accept that.
Sailor: I AM GOING TO HAVE AUTISM NOW!
Me: You’re seriously making me angry. Stop.
Sailor: You don’t know! Prove it! You can’t! Don’t come at me with your science and facts either. LIES!
Me: People actually believe that shit that you’re saying you know.
Sailor: Well, people are dumb.