Sailor: I got my flu shot today. My shoulder hurts and it’s hot **starts rubbing his shoulder**
Me: That’s a bummer.
Me: Oh stop.
Sailor: I might become an anti-vaxer, this sucks.
Me: Well, it’s been a good run. Guess we’ll have to get divorced now because I can’t accept that.
Sailor: I AM GOING TO HAVE AUTISM NOW!
Me: You’re seriously making me angry. Stop.
Sailor: You don’t know! Prove it! You can’t! Don’t come at me with your science and facts either. LIES!
Me: People actually believe that shit that you’re saying you know.
Sailor: Well, people are dumb.
The Sailor and I were watching “The Intern” starring Robert De Niro and Anne Hathaway. There is a scene where the widower, Ben, that De Niro plays takes in a young fellow intern into his home to loan him a room after his parents kick him out while he finds his first apartment. As he gives the young man a tour, the young man sees his perfect made bed with decorative throw pillows and comments, “I like that you do the throw pillow thing” and Ben replies, “I was married for a very long time…” and nods kind of sadly…
Me: *Sitting, cocooned by all my feathery throw pillows…* Babe, after I die will you keep all my throw pillows around?
Sailor: Ha, no.
Sailor: Well I mean maybe as fire starters for my bonfires…